The fear to shine and stand out from others
Have you ever been afraid to show your virtues and stand out?
The answer to this question may be yes. If so, stay to know why and what you can do in your day to day to solve this problem.
The fear of standing out: a psychological problem that self-sabotages us
Sadly, we live in a society that generally educates us to be competitive with each other and to follow certain patterns in which we must fit in order to be accepted, even if these are not in line with the unique and individual part of our being.
From this education of the competitive world, people begin to live unconsciously from the fear of not fitting in, of not being good enough and of not belonging to the normative.
There are two things that derive from this unconscious fear. Firstly, that as a society we tend to sanction and condemn the talents of others, and secondly that, as individuals, we tend to hide our virtues and achievements.
Have you ever wondered why you are so afraid to stand out? Or why do people find it difficult to demonstrate their virtues to a group? The reason is this. Society condemns what is different and generates an unconscious fear in the person to stand out and go outside the norm, creating a lack of freedom of expression of the capabilities and virtues of the individual, thus generating a greater tendency to conformity and that the individual remains within the group mean.
The phenomenon of group conformity
In 1951 Solomon Asch demonstrated this phenomenon in accordance with the group known as “Solomon syndrome” or, in other words, the fear of standing out and / or going outside the norm. This fact implies recognizing that we are less free than we think, since we are more conditioned by the environment than we initially believe, as Asch demonstrated.
When our fear of standing out above others and being rejected by the group is present, We can even make decisions in our life that hinder our personal progress in order to continue in what the majority of the group understands as normal. and it is socially accepted. However, this type of behavior to avoid standing out and going off the average lead us to have problems in the long run, such as low self-esteem, lack of self-confidence and feelings of inferiority.
In addition, when we are guided by that need not to get out of the natural within the environment, a feeling of emptiness begins to appear, since there is a need for self-realization that is not being resolved out of fear of being punished or judged by the environment.
Tips for not giving in to the fear of standing out
What can we do? Let’s see 8 little tips to start breaking with the fear of standing out and shining.
- Recognize our virtues, thank them and appreciate them.
- Breaking the belief that excelling at something or being good at something is negative for you or others.
- Pass on your strengths and successes to others, with assertiveness and humility.
- Being aware that we are acting from the fear of being rejected by the environment. Reassess the situation and face exposing our virtues to the rest (believe me, showing your capabilities is not as horrible as you think).
- Realize that the virtues are different in each one, that there is diversity and that we can all learn and teach.
- Thank and appreciate when someone values us.
- Be grateful and value the virtues of others.
- Transform envy into admiration.
- Ask for therapeutic help if this is generating a conflict that prevents us from moving forward in our life.
I hope this article helps you better understand where this fear of expressing your talents and standing out comes from and that it helps you work on it.